Why I won't be around for several days
I posted the following at Dkos :
Two days after Christmas my father had a massive heart attack. He has never regained consciousness. Today he took a turn for the worst and he is unlikely to live more than a day or two. I'm flying down to be with my mother in the morning.
My dad was an arch-Republican. When my parents lived in Louisiana, he voted for David Duke for governor. Whenever he came to visit, he insisted on watching Fox News instead of CNN -- the "Clinton News Network."
As you may suspect, this was always a source of conflict in our relationship. But despite my dad's political leanings, I always respected his extraordinary work ethic and his inherent fairness.
And now that it appears he will not be around to tell me how ridiculous I am for being a Democrat, I find myself missing him and wishing he would tell me again what a chowderhead I am for voting for John Kerry.
I say all this because I know that there are many Kossacks who have strained relations with family members over politics. It's a difficult thing. You want to stay close to your family, but their politics infuriate you. And you don't know what to do.
So here's some advice -- your family is your family. You didn't choose them but they are who they are, regardless of their politics.
Embrace your Republican parents/children/inlaws/whatever and tell them how much you love them in spite of their political leanings.
Because, in the final analysis, nothing matters more than family.
So, sons, tell your fathers that you love them -- no matter how difficult it is. When you find yourself having to plan a funeral, you will be so grateful that you told your dad how much you loved him and how much he taught you.
My Republican Dad taught me the value of hard work and the value of giving your best effort, no matter what job you might have. And for that, I consider him the world's greatest progressive.
Rest in peace, dad.
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Comments :
oh my god man
I am so sorry to hear that :( My thoughts are with you and your family.
I am so sorry and you are so right. Your family is your family. And losing your loved one is unimaginable suffering.
Take care quaoar and bring your mom some peace of mind.
"To discuss evil in a manner implying neutrality, is to sanction it." AR
My best wishes to your family.
I'm very sorry to hear this.
Saint, n. A dead sinner revised and edited. - Ambrose Bierce
You have my deepest sympathies
(as tears literally pour down my cheeks)
What an absolutely beautiful tribute to your father.
It is the economy, stupid.
Vaya con Dios
Whatever "Dios" that happens to be for you, personally.
I came. I saw. I posted.
Veni, Vidi, Bitchy.
My condolences
Losing a parent is so awful. I hope you are able to ease his last moments. My mother passed at home, in her own bed, with most of her children gathered around her. It was always her wish not to die in a hospital bed. Being there for her as she left was the hardest thing I've ever had to do, but I'm so glad I did.
He'll still be calling you a chowderhead. You just won't be able to hear him, that's all. Pass on his stories. He sounds like he was a great guy.
"Perplexity is the beginning of knowledge" -- Kahlil Gibran
quaoar
is wise beyond his young years. I thank him for his thoughts in this diary.
"To discuss evil in a manner implying neutrality, is to sanction it." AR
My deepest condolence
You are so right about not letting politics get in the way of relationships especially within family.
I am sorry and my deepest condolences to you and your family.
My thoughts
are with you and your family.
Your lesson is a valuable one, especially for those of us in similar situations.
Thanks for sharing, and I hope your family the best during these hard times.
I was so
distracted by work last week that I missed a lot of what was going on with other people. My deepest sympathies to you and your family.
hugs,
Mike Pridmore
Just got back from a conference
So sorry to hear about your father. Thanks for posting this here.
Come, my friends. 'Tis not too late to seek a newer world -- Tennyson
Thank you to everyone
I returned from Florida yesterday.
My dad died early Saturday morning. The funeral was Monday, which was oddly ironic seeins as how it was MLK Day. My dad's birthday was April 4, the day that MLK was assassinated.
He never did regain consciousness and was deteriorating rapidly. The respirator and feeding tubes were removed on Friday and he was given morphine until he passed away about 4:30 a.m. My entire family had been shuttling back and forth from the hospital for the two weeks he was there. On Friday night he seemed somewhat stable so everyone went home to get some sleep. I stayed and tried to catch some sleep in the adjacent hospital bed. When the nurse came in at 3:30 and I woke up, he was OK, but when she came in at 4:30, he had stopped breathing. The end came peacefully.
The funeral was very nice. A military honor guard presented a flag to my mother. My father had served in the Army.
My mother had asked me to deliver a eulogy. I only hope that I did justice to his life.
qui tacet consentire
Glad to have you back,
and please send our best wishes to your mother - I hope she's doing alright.
Saint, n. A dead sinner revised and edited. - Ambrose Bierce